The Rules of Friendship

meangirls-burnbook
[Photo: Mean Girls, Paramount Pictures]
In his poem, “Miserable,” Giorge Leedy wrote:

Release the toxic and infectious-
Spreaders of misery,
Souls destroying souls-
And poisonous liars.

Awaken from the hallucinations-
And take back your heart.
Reclaim your self-esteem-
And leave the toxic be.

While he could be speaking about any kind of relationship at all — I am interpreting it as not only a romantic kind, but a platonic one as well. Because toxicity is not only for a bad sort of lover, but a bad sort of friend, too.

There are rules to friendship. Gretchen Weiners called it when Cady started crushing on Georgina’s ex-boyfriend:

rulesoffeminism
[Photo: Mean Girls, Paramount Pictures]
And Barney Stinson wrote an entire book based on his version of the Bro Code:

how-i-met-your-mother-broath
[Photo: How I Met Your Mother, CBS]
The point is, friendship is built on trust and respect, unlike love that is emotion all on its own. You can only have good friends if you’re a good egg, and there is no such thing as an unrequited friendship, just persons with bad judgment in regards to the company they keep.

So at what cost would you stay with a person who you realize was not a good investment? Wait until he sucks all the happy in you? Wait until you’ve been taken advantage of? Wait until an unspeakable friendship crime has been committed?

There is already too much negativity in the world for you to spend your time with toxic people. Don’t do that to yourself.

You deserve better.

 

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